Gone to Oregon
'Gone to Oregon' is the opening number in Team StarKids' 2014 musical 'The Trail to Oregon' with lyrics by Jeff Blim and Dew De Four. In it, the main family, made up of Father (Jeff Blim), Mother (Rachael Soglin), Son (Lauren Lopez), Daughter (Jaime Lyn Beatty) and Grandfather (Corey Dorris), have their names chosen by the audience. These names remain throughout the show. Lyrics: Father (Mother, Daughter, Son, Grandpa): Good-mornin'! (Good-mornin'!) We stand before the journey That leads us all To Oregon (To Oregon) A pioneer adventure Down the trail. To Oregon Mother, Daughter, Son (Grandpa): To Oregon (To Wisconsin) Father: (Spoken) Grandpa? Grandpa: (Spoken) What? My legs hurt. Father: ''' By God's command We dare to land in Ore- '''Grandpa: Wisconsin Father: (Spoken) We're going to Oregon, Grandpa. Grandpa: (Spoken) Well I want to go to Wisconsin. Father: The promised land will not wait for us We leave our home with faith and trust We'll find the place of our destiny And spread our family seed Mother, Daughter, Son, Grandpa: We'll find the place of our destiny And spread our family seed Father: Now the show begins... All: Aauuhhmm... Father: '''(Spoken, Live Version Only): Hey there Pioneers! You know, in the 1840s' folks of all kinds left their homes in the east and headed down the Trail to Oregon? Yep, whether they were Carpenters, Bankers, or heck, even Farmers. All three kinds of people. Yeah, it was Americas' original family road trip and today pioneers you've caught the Oregon fever. Now it's time to name your family, and take them down the trail. You excited? I'm excited. You excited? You look excited. '''Father: Now our journey begins in the 1800s In a little city in Missouri Before we start you decide on the names Of all the people in our wagon party You must decide who these pioneers are Are they carpenters or bankers or leavin' their farm? It's time to spin a personal yarn Mother: Carefully choose each name Cause this is more than a game All: It's more than a game Oh, yeah, it's more than a game No two shows will ever be the same Mother: My first pioneer will be President Polk I know he'd be a good leader of the wagon Father: Good job now, dear, that's what we're goin' for You'd be extra careful not to kill him Son: I think I would use my mom and dad's names of course So I'll make sure they'll never get divorced Father: That might be too much information But hey, it's great to have a personal connection Daughter: I would make my family rich They'd be bankers from New York Father: (Spoken) Good. Son: Richie, Johnny, Emily and Peter and Sue Their bank fell down and now they're poor Father: That's great kids Keep up the good work Mother: Hey, Grandpa What would your names be? Grandpa: Oh, well let me tell ya: Dicksuck, Dick-face, Hairy-Tit, and Dr. Buttnugget Father: (Spoken) Grandpa? What the hell is that supposed to be? Grandpa: ''' (Spoken) They're names. '''Father: (Spoken) Hairy-Tit? Grandpa, you're setting a bad example for our pioneers here. You're gonna' make them think it's a good idea to name their wagon party stupid thing. Grandpa: ''' (Spoken) Well they should. It'd be real funny. '''All: We are gone to Oregon It's the greatest family vacation It'll bring us together Couldn't think of nothin' better Hey! Time for some family fun On the trail to Oreg-un (Dialogue, Fathers' name chosen) Father: I'm Jack Bauer, a farmer from Illinois All my skills will be useless on the trail My beautiful family is counting on me A lot of pressure, I can't afford to fail (Dialogue, Mothers' name chosen) Mother: I'm Slippery-When-Wet and I'm a mother of two Could've been a banker, guess a farmer will do Why did you get to choose? (Dialogue, Daughter and Sons' name chosen) Son: Craphole, yeah that's me I'm seven and I'm male Daughter: Mouthface, is what my friends call me I'm looking for love on the trail Son: (Spoken) Ew gross! Daughter: I hope you're bit by a snake! Son: I hope you break your back! Father: Hey, I found wild fruit! Son: Pay attention, Dad! Daughter: Can we just stop at the forts? Father: I forgot to shave Mother: Did we bring enough food? Grandpa: Can I write on Grandpa's grave? Mother: Everyone just behave! Father: Because it's only then a game All: It's only a game I guess it's only a game The Trail To Oregon is nothing but a game We'll be there soon in Oreg-oon Honestly, it beats milking cow tits We could be in the kitchen Doing something with a chicken But we couldn't give less of a crap Cause we're making it to Oreg-ap (Dialogue, Grandfathers' name chosen) It's time to run to Oreg-un It's too late to change the show now You could go next door And see something professional We wouldn't blame you a bit If you're sitting through this Ore-shit We're Broadway-bound in Oreg-ound Cause there's no Broadway in Chicago Who will forget their name And who will get the YouTube fame? These are questions to ask When you're playing Oreg-ask... It's more than a game... Life is really great... On the trail to Oreg-ate Category:Songs